I grew up surrounded by very stable, happily married couples. While I’m not claiming to have some sort of Norman Rockwell delusion about the trials and hardships that accompany committed relationships, I do know that I was surrounded by strong committed men. What I want to know is how did they get there? Are men only willing to commit when they have no other option? Is commitment really just the by-product of an ultimatum?
Are all men designed for single life, and they just get trapped by some manipulative female who places an “either/or” in front of them? Now I know there are men out there who see marriage as a sacred institute that must be fought for and earned…at least I think there are. But maybe just maybe, the idea that marriage is some sort of ideology that women buy into and men succumb to because…well why?
I have to believe that men have a very true and real desire for companionship. I believe that they really do want a confidant. I believe they want someone they can trust with all. Someone who believes in them, who lifts them up, who makes them laugh, and who they truly enjoy spending time with. And let’s not forget sex. Men want sex. What I wonder is, do men ultimately just want options? Options for their time, their attention, and their money?
I guess eventually women either force the subject or men discover that by allowing themselves “the options”, they risk having to be out on the hunt again. I guess eventually, a man has to be more afraid of what he might loose than abstractly curious about what else may be out there. What do you think?